A to Z of Football: K is for...

...Kits

Football kits are a form of modern art, a symbol of tribal identity and, occasionally, bloody hilarious. There's so much that can be said, so here's some of it.

As strips (well, shirts) became a staple part of the football supporter's wardrobe, money and the resentment of money have come into play. Shirts in England are expensive, and re-issued far too regularly. During the late 90s Manchester United became the poster-child for masses of rip-off shirts, sometimes three a season.

Funnily enough, United also feature heavily in some bizarre kits. I put a bit of a shout on Twitter for favourite old kits, and United featured heavily. Thanks for these suggestions, you know who you are.

United famously scrapped this grey number at half time against Southampton because it camouflaged the players against the crowd. This absolute belter apparently harked back to Newton Heath, but gives me only memories of Wembley.

Other favourites include pink efforts from Palermo (their regular colour), Juventus and Scotland, this stormer from Coventry, and one which I actually owned. I didn't own this vile Wolves shirt, natch.

But let's face it, Jorge Campos was the king.

...Kick-off times

Outlandish kick-off times are an evolving symptom of TV-era English football. All traditional-style fans prefer the 3 o'clock kick-off on a Saturday afternoon, but television has increased the number of weekend lunchtime and evening kick-offs, and Monday night football.

Kick-offs have also been move to accommodate teams in UEFA competitions (again, TV-related) and by the police for various reasons. To date, the worst I've known is a 6.30pm on a Sunday. What the hell!?

...Keggy Keegle

Ah, Keggy Keegle. 6-0-6 regulars will know that this is the name given to First/Second/Third Coming, Kevin Keegan, by Danny Baker. For everyone outside Liverpool and Newcastle, Keegle is a figure of fun. He's obviously a little bit mental, and his easygoing shakability and penchant for a rant would make him popular if he wasn't such a sycophant when it comes to the Newcastle fans.

Keegan's almost mythical status at Newcastle (which matches his actually mythical managerial ability) is quite odd, but more odd was his appearance in Green Cross Code ads and his 'love it' outburst way back when.

Rarely has one man received such adoration from a small number of supporters and such pity from everyone else. God bless you, Keggy.

...Killer pass

Yet another piece of bullshit-bingo football terminology, the killer pass is a thing to behold, and is the missing ingredient from the play of every nearly club. This is the pass that opens up a defence, cracks it open to give forwards a clear run on goal.

Nowhere is the killer pass more thrilling than on Pro Evolution Soccer. So many happy memories...

Don't forget - the twofootedtackle A to Z of Football is a weekly feature, and your contributions would be welcome and appreciated. If you'd like a football term discussed, feel free to leave a comment and I'll look into it.