Uppers for goalposts

If it weren't potentially so serious, this would be one for Danny Baker's excellent new Saturday morning show on Radio 5 Live. BBC News is reporting that a bag containing "dangerous drugs" has been stolen from a park in Bournemouth.

The park in question is Kings Park in Boscombe, where I played most of my Sunday League football as a youngster and also the home of AFC Bournemouth. The mystery surrounding the case - the bag was reported stolen by the owner, so we can probably rule out Class A fundrugs - is a little bizarre, but this, dear readers, is a football blog.

And this bag o' drugs was stolen while being used as...a goalpost. Not only is that completely insane but it speaks volumes about the beautiful game.

Football: the universal language. And if you don't have a jumper handy in the park, you can always use a sack full of undisclosed narcotics. Just keep an eye on it.